[oh please zelos there's no danger to your person here. just maybe your hair.
because look, he's not a fucking physicist or something. he IS, however, a little shit who has learned through trial and error how to get a garden hose spray to shoot as far as possible.
so yeah he's seeing if it reaches across the street HAVE FUN ZELOS!! ares sure is!]
[Baroona will only be able to hear the muffled girlish shrieking of Zelos' agony as he scrambles to turn his lawn chair into a shield. He still ends up soaked.]
[He'd type more except he's hiding from water and has to tuck his phone away temporarily... Just in time to see Ares shooting water up at Baroona. Zelos stands tall again, startled.
So, hopefully Ares enjoys his plan being interrupted by Zelos running across the street to tackle him.]
[Trips to the mailbox were always a pain because it meant crossing the street and struggling with the wonky, bent keyhole Zelos had been left with upon moving in. He's fighting with it as Baroona approaches.]
Oh, come on! How hard can it be to open this flimsy thing?!
[He pauses once his noise is interrupted by the sound of gentle footsteps beside him. Still in a pose half-strangling the mailbox, he gives the shirtless man a once over.]
Are you seriously coming to get the mail without a shirt on? [He didn't get the memo that this was socially acceptable now...]
[Ha. See? They're both being socially unacceptable. He nudges Zelos aside as he hunts down his mailbox, passing through each of the 6,000 keys they've given him since moving in. Which one was for the mailbox again?] Haven't had coffee yet. No coffee, no clothes.
[He pulls his hand back as he's nudged aside only to shove it back in a few dramatic gestures at the keyhole. It's dented along the edges.]
This thing's been messed up since I moved in here! Can you believe that? [He places his hand on his hip, frowning as he peers around Baroona to inspect his key searching.] At least you could get coffee whenever you want. They outright rejected my requests for help about the damn thing.
[He catches Zelos looking over his shoulder and it gives him an idea.] Hey. Here. Let me take a look. [Slapping Zelos' chest, he hands him his ring of keys and slips Zelos' into his hand.] You take care of mine.
[Cue Baroona going through a series of movements that are a bit too close to becoming lock-picking.]
[He takes the ring of keys and sorts through them with ease. Mailbox keys aren't too hard. It's not the shape that gives it away, but the numbers on the front— he finds the one starting with the right combo soon enough and holds onto it.
Then, he's peering to check on Baroona's progress, a little skeptical of how he's handling it. There's no way he could break in like that, right?]
I think I've got the easy end of this deal. Do me a favor and try not to break my key, okay? I do need to get in there eventually.
["So quiet down and let him work" is implied. It takes him longer than it does Zelos, fiddling and pressing, but when he does finally finish–the lock clicks and the mailbox swings open. Baroona tosses Zelos key back to him, sidestepping the mail that comes spilling from Zelos' box.]
There you go. [He toys with the key Zelos found, eyes still on the mail that poured from Zelos' box.] I didn't think these boxes could hold that much.
[He's legitimately impressed that Baroona was able to open his mailbox with his key, and this may be why. He reaches to catch the falling letters, gathering them in his arms with a laugh.]
Oh, this? It's nothing. You should have seen it the other week! Sometimes I really can't get it open and have to wait for the mailman to pass it to me from the back!
[He sure is juggling with these letters, but he seems to be managing for now. There's a specific one he's searching for, thumbing through the piles lightly. It has to be in there somewhere, she said it would be.] I seriously owe you one for this. You're new, right? Moved in right across the street from me. [He nods back to his own house.]
Why don't you let me take you out for coffee? Think of it as a special favor from the Great Zelos himself! ♥
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Anyway, the window's in plain sight! I just so happen to be sunbathing outside. Wanna take a peek?
[If he does, Zelos sure will be lounging in a chair on his front lawn in a speedo and sunglasses while waving.]
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sLAMS THE WINDOW SHUT]
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STOP BEING A CREEP!
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[That's his shout right back at Ares, half-sitting up as he shakes his fist closed around the phone at Ares.]
Barooooonaaaaaaaa! You're so mean! He's going to kill me at this rate!
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try your best! i think he's coming out to greet you
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because look, he's not a fucking physicist or something. he IS, however, a little shit who has learned through trial and error how to get a garden hose spray to shoot as far as possible.
so yeah he's seeing if it reaches across the street HAVE FUN ZELOS!! ares sure is!]
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[Baroona will only be able to hear the muffled girlish shrieking of Zelos' agony as he scrambles to turn his lawn chair into a shield. He still ends up soaked.]
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Go get him, Ares!
[To Zelos:] you'll have to do better than that ;p
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He's your weirdo stalker, Baroona!
[so why is this up to him, huh?? he aims a short jet of water at the open window this time, hoping for a sneak attack.]
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[Which begs the question why is Baroona encouraging this? Only he knows.]
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[He'd type more except he's hiding from water and has to tuck his phone away temporarily... Just in time to see Ares shooting water up at Baroona. Zelos stands tall again, startled.
So, hopefully Ares enjoys his plan being interrupted by Zelos running across the street to tackle him.]
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Oh, come on! How hard can it be to open this flimsy thing?!
[He pauses once his noise is interrupted by the sound of gentle footsteps beside him. Still in a pose half-strangling the mailbox, he gives the shirtless man a once over.]
Are you seriously coming to get the mail without a shirt on? [He didn't get the memo that this was socially acceptable now...]
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[Ha. See? They're both being socially unacceptable. He nudges Zelos aside as he hunts down his mailbox, passing through each of the 6,000 keys they've given him since moving in. Which one was for the mailbox again?] Haven't had coffee yet. No coffee, no clothes.
[He glances back at him.] What's your excuse?
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[He pulls his hand back as he's nudged aside only to shove it back in a few dramatic gestures at the keyhole. It's dented along the edges.]
This thing's been messed up since I moved in here! Can you believe that? [He places his hand on his hip, frowning as he peers around Baroona to inspect his key searching.] At least you could get coffee whenever you want. They outright rejected my requests for help about the damn thing.
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[He catches Zelos looking over his shoulder and it gives him an idea.] Hey. Here. Let me take a look. [Slapping Zelos' chest, he hands him his ring of keys and slips Zelos' into his hand.] You take care of mine.
[Cue Baroona going through a series of movements that are a bit too close to becoming lock-picking.]
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[He takes the ring of keys and sorts through them with ease. Mailbox keys aren't too hard. It's not the shape that gives it away, but the numbers on the front— he finds the one starting with the right combo soon enough and holds onto it.
Then, he's peering to check on Baroona's progress, a little skeptical of how he's handling it. There's no way he could break in like that, right?]
I think I've got the easy end of this deal. Do me a favor and try not to break my key, okay? I do need to get in there eventually.
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["So quiet down and let him work" is implied. It takes him longer than it does Zelos, fiddling and pressing, but when he does finally finish–the lock clicks and the mailbox swings open. Baroona tosses Zelos key back to him, sidestepping the mail that comes spilling from Zelos' box.]
There you go. [He toys with the key Zelos found, eyes still on the mail that poured from Zelos' box.] I didn't think these boxes could hold that much.
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[He's legitimately impressed that Baroona was able to open his mailbox with his key, and this may be why. He reaches to catch the falling letters, gathering them in his arms with a laugh.]
Oh, this? It's nothing. You should have seen it the other week! Sometimes I really can't get it open and have to wait for the mailman to pass it to me from the back!
[He sure is juggling with these letters, but he seems to be managing for now. There's a specific one he's searching for, thumbing through the piles lightly. It has to be in there somewhere, she said it would be.] I seriously owe you one for this. You're new, right? Moved in right across the street from me. [He nods back to his own house.]
Why don't you let me take you out for coffee? Think of it as a special favor from the Great Zelos himself! ♥