teaism | pls don't judge me I have so many injured guren icons okay

pls don't judge me I have so many injured guren icons okay

[Compared to this, the talking furniture from ages ago seemed almost pleasant. The door clicks shut behind them, and Guren almost wants to drop down right here. It's the first building they've come across in a while now— some sort of cabin in the woods that's falling apart just like the rest of the town they'd started in. Guren was bleeding from a variety of areas— a number of spots on his torso, his head, his face, his thigh— and that doesn't even start on the broken bones he's sporting, but he had a demon to take care of those injuries.

The man he was trying to support next to him was a different story. Hadn't they said something about not wanting to test if he could die and come back...?]

Look at me, Dex. [Guren wasn't trying to hide his worry now. He'd arrived too late, or at least that's his perspective. He shows up and something is nearly finished toying with Dextera like he's some sort of doll— something grey, with wings. Guren couldn't grasp what was happening, but interrupting had shown him that he was nearly outmatched. Nearly. With some biting words, he'd slain the creature(?) just before he was about to be offed himself. It was risky, to say the least.

But they're indoors now. Indoors, and there have to be supplies they can make use of somewhere. He staggers his next step forward as he tries to lead Dextera in, coughing blood against the back of his own hand. He's noticing that even his own injuries are staying longer than usual, somehow...]

Damn it...

[But he needs to know how Dextera is doing. How much can he handle? Guren doesn't want to find out his limit right now. One hand grips at Dextera's shoulder. They've been supporting each other the whole walk here, and he's trying not to weigh him down. His other hand, though the back of it is bloody now, rests against Dextera's chest carefully.] Sit down here.

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[ dextera doesn't want to get out. it's such a powerful desire that it surprises him, but his whole heart rejects the idea of escaping now, when they're this close—this hot, their bodies touching without anything in between. it's like the water itself is bleeding out dextera's near-virginal modesty, and in response to guren's quiet assurance, his eyelids lower. ]

I will.

[ that, he promises, even if he can't imagine acting on it when there's something much better, much more appealing right in front of him. ]

But I don't want to.

[ he hides his face and kisses the place where guren's neck curves into his shoulder—if he's standing upright, they're almost the same height, but his habitual slouch means that he's at the perfect angle to hide away and kiss guren's warm skin instead of confronting how badly he wants more of this. ]

[This is immediately more intense than what's normal. Guren always has desires, but he's usually too well trained to hold them back, when it comes to things like this. Mahiru had tried to encourage things like lust out of him when he was first dealing with his demon, and it came out then, of course— and this felt a little like that. That discipline that kept those thoughts and feelings bottled up wasn't enough, right now.

His breath hitches at a simple kiss like that, and silence adds even more tension to the air between them. Reacting too passionately would be too much. Pushing forward would be too much. As he's telling himself these things, one of his hands traces down Dextera's arm until his fingers can curl around his wrist.]

Dextera. [He breathes, quiet and slow as he tries to steady himself. It's dizzying, and there's a faint feeling that that should be alarming, but that's completely overwhelmed by everything else. This won't make him lose control. It's a simple desire, one that anyone has.

Of course, in an intimate place like this, he'd get that strong urge to be intimate again. This is something special.] I want you.

[And right now, he doesn't care how blunt he is about it.]

[ the slower they move, the more unbearable it becomes. he doesn't know what to do with himself, suddenly, and he's glad that his face is hidden—but he can't stay like that for long. with guren's fingers around his wrist, he shudders out a sigh, terribly interested despite himself. interested enough that he doesn't attribute the strangeness of this feeling to the water.

it feels like the natural next step, of being together like this. ]

You can have me. [ he pulls his other hand out of the water, lifting his head just enough to look guren in the eyes, and presses his thumb to guren's mouth. it's not as sweet as it was when they fell asleep—now, it feels a little more like a protection, like he knows if they start kissing now they're not going to stop. ] I want you too.

[ he feels that, certainly, in the pit of his stomach. ]

Then we have each other.

[Slow words draw out the way he squeezes at Dextera's wrist, thoughtful, tempted, not sure if he should hold back or press forward. The thumb at his mouth is even something more distracting than it has any right to be. He parts his lips just slightly, eyes watching Dextera's for a reaction as his teeth scrape over that thumb, tongue pressing against it.

There's no room for embarrassment with this growing heat. His body presses forward with a step, aiming to pin Dextera's against the rocks at the edge of the hot spring behind him. His breath comes out in a shudder. He can't help himself. And even if he knows that the first kiss will make it impossible for them to stop, he's burning up to let that loose already.

Pushing past that thumb, he presses Dextera's wrist against the rocks, too, his head ducking forward to get to Dextera's neck, breathing against his skin.] Let's not hold back.

[Even at the lustiest he's ever been with his human heart in control, he has to be careful and pause for acknowledgement before he just acts on that.]

[ dextera wants everything. this isn't like before, the first time—there's something heavy in the air between them, something impossible to resist that makes him want to lose himself to the incredible heat hanging over them. against the rocks, with guren's breath on his neck, he's pretty sure that guren could kill him and it would somehow still be erotic. ]

I won't. You shouldn't either.

[ an assurance, even a catch-all—dextera can take anything guren wants to give, and he can give anything guren wants to have.

that's a reckless promise to make, even if it's only to himself, but it's something he feels with absolute confidence. he trusts guren with his life, and even if lust is obscuring his judgment somewhat, it's hard to care when guren's pressing his wrist so tightly to the rocks. he'd probably be glad to die like this. ]

Guren.

[His name is all he wants to hear like that. Don't hold back, they want each other, they have each other, and his name. He likes the way it sounds like that, and that's all he can think as his free hand tangles into Dextera's hair and yanks his head back at an uncomfortably unnatural angle.

It exaggerates their small height difference and Dextera's slouch, and Guren presses forward with his whole body. Chest to chest, pinning Dextera even more against the rocks, mouth over mouth, his tongue already forcing itself inside, and his fingernails digging into that wrist he's holding as he pushes that back, as well.

It's a violent need that he doesn't quite understand, but he's familiar enough with, despite everything else. He doesn't just want to kiss, he wants to kiss forcefully until one of them bleeds. He wants to overwhelm Dextera in a new way, to bring out every sensation and leave them both gasping for air.

He's not calm at all, and right now, he doesn't know how to be.]

[ dextera gasps when guren pulls his hair like that—a mix of surprise and arousal, something that he didn't get to fully express when the night before, they were being sweet and coy about it. whatever mood has come over them here, he feels like it's all right to show those darker sides of him, the parts of him that want to bite and claw and have the same things done to him.

the violence is—exciting, in a way that he doesn't like to admit outside of battle. it makes his heart pound with the knowledge that he's alive, and the harder guren pushes against him, the harder he pushes back. he wants. that's all he can think, suddenly. he wants guren so badly he's dizzied by it, and he grips guren's shoulder for leverage—nails forming red crescents against his skin—as he kisses back, all teeth and hunger in the same way he sometimes approaches the flesh of monsters.

to his credit, he feels pretty monstrous right now. he wants to swallow guren whole. ]

[At some point in this violent show of passion, his skin breaks at his lip, and he laughs as he tries to return the favor. You can't fake a pleasured laugh like this, and if Guren weren't so completely overwhelmed with this feeling, he might be more embarrassed or completely reluctant to allow it. Right now, though, it's exciting. It's the two of them, learning more, doing more, feeling.

He releases Dextera's wrist just so he can wrap around his back, instead. Pushing and pulling him into him, fingers scratching at his back, Guren doesn't know where to begin. He has this strong desire to squeeze Dextera until he breaks, and that amazing amount of hunger coming from him in turn is even more incredible. Desire, so strong and pointed at him. And him, just the same, gasping for breath to the side of Dextera's face.

He wonders if anything is going to be enough.]

[ as soon as dextera gets the first metallic taste of blood, he's suddenly kissing guren's mouth that mucher harder, like he wants to drink it—a little vampiric, perhaps, but that can't be helped in a moment like this. he has to part for breath, too, chest heaving and guren's blood painting his mouth red, but there's no part of him that wants to stop.

he wants to feel guren's nails digging into him like talons, leaving marks across his back and bleeding him into the water. ]

Guren. [ again, he says guren's name, his newly freed hand sliding down guren's side, gripping his waist. he licks his lips, and then kisses the part of guren's lip that's split open. ] More.

[ harder. ]

[ More. He wants more, too. The way Dextera kisses at him makes him gasp, his nails digging harder into Dextera’s back, his teeth dragging and digging back at his lips. “More,” he says, and Guren’s head spins. He yanks harder at Dextera’s hair before that hand slips down, too, pushing at his shoulder, clawing down his chest. He can’t get enough. He shudders with his next breath. ]

Dextera... [ It’s hard to breathe like this, as worked up as he is, but he doesn’t want to stop at all. Desperate for more friction to go with these sensations, he rocks his hips against him, groaning shamelessly when he does. That, and the soreness of his red lips— what a nice combination.

How much will satisfy them? Like this, it feels like it could never end, and he doesn’t mind that at all. What does he want, what more does he want... his mind is spinning with possibilities, but he doesn’t want to stop. He ducks, and though he doesn’t bite at Dextera’s neck, he does kiss there, sucking, aiming to leave a mark. His hands scratch more, down Dextera’s back and front, gripping hard enough at arm or shoulder or waist to bruise.

And then, after another grind of his hips, he pulls back, eyes lighting up wildly in pleasure. It’s not far that he moves, but it’s enough to say chase me, which seems to be what he always wants. His thumb swipes at his bleeding lip, and he remembers that Mahiru isn’t able to heal him right now. That’s a little more exciting. He’s trying to catch his breath enough to say what he wants, but it’s more difficult than he thought. ] Come get more.

[ dextera wants all this pain—the water licks away at the edges of it, not enough to numb it, but enough that all he has to focus on is how much it emphasizes his pleasure, how much more of this he wants. they might claw each other to pieces, with their respective enthusiasm for this, but that doesn't sound like a bad way to go. he wants to be bruised up, to be opened, even if he did just heal from those very things happening before.

guren isn't an enemy. every mark, every bite, every scratch is a sign of possessiveness, the kind that dextera sometimes feels like he needs in order to feel whole.

he's so hard that he aches there, too, his muscles taut with desire—all the more when guren invites him to chase. there's no danger here except what they find in each other, and isn't that the best kind? he closes the distance between them, taking guren's hand like he always has... but then he's licking that blood off his thumb, maintaining a focused kind of eye contact that suggests this is what he wants more of. ]

[ More of that, huh. Dextera really is vampire like. Guren presses his thumb down against Dextera’s tongue, eyes watching him with heavy interest as he steps back once more. This time, he’s pulling Dextera with him, lowering his body to sit in the spring. He only pulls his eyes away briefly to find a particularly sharp rock over the side of the edge. He grabs it, shoving it into Dextera’s other hand while he leans close, over him, biting at his lip again.

There was a time a long time ago when he was afraid of anyone touching his dirty blood. But now, he wants them to mix, he wants to feel Dextera’s metallic tang in his mouth along with his own, and he wants to lose more. The dizziness and pleasure he can get from that, but with the trust he gives Dextera— he wants it. ]

[ it's almost better not to say anything, as silence has always served them the best. dextera holds the edge of the rock in one hand, the other cupping guren's face as they kiss until finally, he too feels the sharp sting of guren's bite splitting the sensitive skin of his lips. he gasps, but it's good. it's all good, and he only pulls away from it because there's something in his hand that he thinks guren wants him to use.

his hand slides down from guren's cheek to his chest, fingers splaying across that smooth expanse of skin. it should bother him, right? to think of hurting him when he loves him so much? and guren can't heal like he should right now, but there's something they're both desiring here, and dextera's heartbeat quickens at the idea of seeing it—doing it.

he's asking with his eyes now, his gaze flitting from his hand to guren's chest to his face. ]

It's okay.

[He stops from sucking at Dextera's broken lip to answer that, his breath heavy and uneven. He wants more. He wants more and more and unless he gets it in this over the top way, will it even be enough? Will he start wanting too much? At least this, right here, is between the two of them. There's trust.

Knowing he won't die at Dextera's hand, there's excitement.]

Do it. [He wants to feel even more alive.]

[ how can he say no after that? guren has practically demanded something of him that he was going to do anyway, with that desirous look in his eyes—and so dextera will follow through.

there’s nothing he can do but this.

he slices across guren’s chest, and before he’s even done, the blood is dripping from the cut he’s left—it’s a little too wide to start with beading, thanks to the imperfect edge of the stone, but it cuts as surely as a knife would. dextera’s heart pounds, and he moves his hand over the edge of the new wound, smearing guren’s blood across his chest, across dextera’s own palm. ]

Guren.

[ that quiet voice, that hunger again—he doesn’t know why he wants this so badly. ]

[The cut hurts, just like any injury would, and the way his body reacts is intoxicating. Pain feels a lot like pleasure when it's in an intense mood like this, and the way his body throbs, tries to fix itself immediately, and his head almost wants to spin— it's all something he wants more of. He wants to give it in turn, too, but the more of this he can get first, the more his other side can come out.

The struggle right now isn't so urgent. It's the same one he faces every day. He has this desire to protect his friends no matter what, and then he has the ambitious part of him that will stop at nothing to get to his end goals— sometimes they clash. Right now, it's like they're trying to meet up. He doesn't want to hurt Dextera, but if that's what Dextera wants, if he wants to feel this crazy sensation— then Guren wants to be the one to give it to him.

He laughs while blood is smeared over his chest. It's quiet, low, but it's a laugh, and if that doesn't say he's enjoying himself, he's not sure what will. He grabs his chin, yanking him into another harsh kiss, pressing his body closer, as close as he can get. Straddling him in this shallow water, keeping them low. His hand travels down from Dextera's chin to his shoulder, squeezing there.]

[ dextera has to stop himself from going a little harder with it, that reflex to kill strong in his veins even if he would never actually do that to guren—so this kiss is a nice replacement, a little too hard, pressing at his broken lip, their blood mingling in their mouths. it satisfies the feral part of him that wants to hurt someone, at least enough that when he strikes across guren’s chest again, he isn’t going to be murdering anyone.

more. more. ]

Hah— [ there’s blood in the water now, a bright red across the clear, crystalline grey. ] Guren—break me.

[ whatever happens, he can purify himself later. it’s more reckless a thought than he’s usually willing to extend, but survival isn’t on his mind. he’s going to live. he might as well make the most of that certainty. ]

[Those words after the strike that has him gasping in pain are all he needs. This is crazy, it's wild, but they both need it, somehow. Guren has caught on by now that the spring is encouraging this, but as long as it doesn't encourage them to death, then it's fine.

His eyes light up, and he reaches for the wrist holding the rock, twisting it back in such a painful way that he means to make Dextera drop it. He's on top of Dextera, really, and he's about to be even more so. His free hand presses flat to Dextera's chest and shoves, pinning him back, watching his face disappear into the hot water enough that his eyes are covered, his nostrils are, too— and his mouth leans down to seal the deal, that harsh kiss stealing any chance at breathing that Dextera has left.

He's on top of it, yanking him back out if he chokes, when he seems to be unable to take more, letting him catch his breath long enough and pushing him back down. He's bleeding everywhere, himself, and his hand is trembling for it, but it feels too good. Dextera really could hurt him. His body really was still human.

All this time, of course, he's getting a lot more focused on what his body wants sexually, as well. He's aroused, there's been no mistaking that, and he wants some relief in more than just tension and pain. His hips continue to rock down, grinding against him, gasping Dextera's name against him as he goes. He wants the push back. He wants to see the desperation, and feel Dextera struggle to stay above it all.]

[ it hurts, when guren twists his wrist like that—of course he drops the rock, and it sinks to the bottom before he can even think of rescuing it. he doesn’t have long to consider it anyway, before he’s being pushed under with it, panic filling his lungs more than air.

but it’s so good, to be scared. every time guren pulls him back up and lets him take just enough of a breath to live, it feels like ecstasy coursing through his body. he knows why, he knows that the deprivation of air, of oxygen, induces hypoxia, rushing dopamine and all those nice endorphins into the brain—as if he’s thinking about it in those terms, though. all he knows is that he’s a little terrified and it feels exquisite, when he also trusts guren not to let anything happen to him.

he can let go completely, forgetting about all the fear or pain or sin he’s ever known, and focus on this moment. he reaches desperately for guren’s shoulders, that push back that guren is looking for, his nails scrabbling against skin. guren can most certainly feel his arousal every time he grinds down, even though dextera is kicking a little too—his body helpless like that, when deprived of air.

it’s impossible not to be close, with this kind of stimulation. the next time guren pulls him up for a breath, dextera looks completely lost in his bliss, digging into guren’s flesh enough to get him to bleed there, too.

he can’t say anything, but there’s a tension in his body that says he wants it just—just one more time. ]

[ One more time. He can tell, he can feel it, and he’s close himself, the biting sting of new marks making him want more. He’s hurting enough now, he’s bled so much that he’s just a little dizzy, and as he pushes Dextera beneath the water again, his eyes try to find his in the middle of the flailing. His other hand keeps him pinned, his body weight makes those kicks useless.

His mouth covers Dextera’s again and he groans into it. Another grind, another focus on the sensation so built up that he can’t believe it. Finally, he pulls Dextera back out of the water again, and brings his other trembling hand to stroke them together.

He’s so close, too. Just a few strokes like that and he releases into the water, but he’s sure to keep his hand going until they both get to that peak, until a few strokes after. ]

[ dextera comes quietly, with little more than a shudder and a gasp that's more for breath than pleasure, but it's a force that surprises him, the dizzying deprivation of oxygen causing him to reach a peak he's never known before. he can say that with confidence, even without memories—this is something beyond anything his body has experienced.

that body of his gives up a little, too, when he comes. he feels floaty, out of the physical reality of the moment, and if guren weren't keeping a hold on him he'd probably just fall back and drown in the water anyway. or maybe not, with how utterly satiated he is, how near-motionless and calm he feels in the aftermath. his vision is white, his ears are ringing, and his gaze is unfocused like he might be on the border of death all over again, but it's good.

it's all good. trying to catch his breath feels good, too, as he finally fills his lungs with what they need. ]

[ Guren needs a few minutes just to get a hold of himself. That undying need for more blood, more violence, more power over something weaker than him fades, and he determines this isn’t as simple as chemicals in the water encouraging them. That’s good, because it means he doesn’t have to rush out of the hot springs with Dex before they do kill each other.

Blood is staining the water. He breathes harshly, but he knows what he wants immediately, and he reaches for Dextera, pulling him up, slipping back off of him so that he’s no longer on top of him but beside him. It’s all in his chest, this pain that’s dull and throbbing by now, so he can be the support. He can pull him to rest against him... even if it is messy that way.

As much as pleasure is still making its way through the both of them, he has the feeling that he should apologize, that he went too far— but Dextera’s expression doesn’t seem that way. So, he just holds him, focusing on his breathing, trying to ignore how dizzy he is from actual blood loss. ]

[ dextera will apologize, inevitably, even if there was a brief discussion that they both wanted this. he worried enough about guren cutting his hand... now he's got two big gashes across his chest that dextera caused. but for now, he's still reeling from his orgasm, from the euphoria, and so he rests against guren as soon as he's got the chance.

the blood... it's not quite as exciting to look at, but it's not scary to see either, in the afterglow. he traces his fingers across guren's chest, wiping some of it away only for the shallow wound to make more. it's not deep, just quite bloody, since the cut was long rather than hard. ]

...

[ the water feels nice, just like it did when they first got in. he closes his eyes, relaxing maybe the way they thought they would before things went this far. ]

[ Guren is leaning back against the rocks, so it’s easier to relax for the both of them. He can be a pillow, for as well as that works, and when Dextera closes his eyes, Guren moves a hand to stroke through his hair, as well. Anything to relax, to calm, to make it known that Dextera is special to him. Precious.

Mahiru pokes through in his thoughts just with a giggle, and a comment that his desire is wonderful. He kind of wishes he didn’t hear it, since it only makes him feel worse, but thankfully his own pleasure and the relaxed way Dextera is acting helps soothe his worries. Mostly.

Maybe they can rest like this for a while. Guren won’t disturb Dextera if he falls asleep or even if they just quietly sit there for a while. ]

[ dextera is satisfied, but he's not tired enough to fall asleep.

he's just relaxing, breathing slowly and deeply until he's sure that his body is back to normal, and then he moves to kiss guren's jaw—his lip is still bleeding a little, but it's mostly just sore now. there's only a dot of blood against guren's skin, where he kisses him. there's no part of him that feels bad about what guren did to him; he just wonders how they're going to talk about this? if they're going to talk about this. they should, maybe, if only in some abstract terms about being careful about the hot springs they slip into next time.

he is content to sit in silence for a while, the water keeping him nice and warm even in the nude like this, but he finally wants to make his voice known. just briefly. luckily for guren, he sounds perfectly normal—maybe a little languid, but that's just the effect of hot water. ]

Guren.

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