teaism | pls don't judge me I have so many injured guren icons okay

pls don't judge me I have so many injured guren icons okay

[Compared to this, the talking furniture from ages ago seemed almost pleasant. The door clicks shut behind them, and Guren almost wants to drop down right here. It's the first building they've come across in a while now— some sort of cabin in the woods that's falling apart just like the rest of the town they'd started in. Guren was bleeding from a variety of areas— a number of spots on his torso, his head, his face, his thigh— and that doesn't even start on the broken bones he's sporting, but he had a demon to take care of those injuries.

The man he was trying to support next to him was a different story. Hadn't they said something about not wanting to test if he could die and come back...?]

Look at me, Dex. [Guren wasn't trying to hide his worry now. He'd arrived too late, or at least that's his perspective. He shows up and something is nearly finished toying with Dextera like he's some sort of doll— something grey, with wings. Guren couldn't grasp what was happening, but interrupting had shown him that he was nearly outmatched. Nearly. With some biting words, he'd slain the creature(?) just before he was about to be offed himself. It was risky, to say the least.

But they're indoors now. Indoors, and there have to be supplies they can make use of somewhere. He staggers his next step forward as he tries to lead Dextera in, coughing blood against the back of his own hand. He's noticing that even his own injuries are staying longer than usual, somehow...]

Damn it...

[But he needs to know how Dextera is doing. How much can he handle? Guren doesn't want to find out his limit right now. One hand grips at Dextera's shoulder. They've been supporting each other the whole walk here, and he's trying not to weigh him down. His other hand, though the back of it is bloody now, rests against Dextera's chest carefully.] Sit down here.

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[He didn't choose the human experimentation life it was just dumped in his lap!! A necessary evil... Can't they bond over being experiments or something?

It doesn't seem like it, right now. He tosses aside his dirty bandage like a filthy litterer and puts a new one on, this time a little more carefully. The wound itself isn't a problem at all, but he doesn't want it to get infected, and now he knows it's what caused... whatever this is.]

You can sense that, huh...

[Well, that's not good. He frowns, and when he's done fixing his hand up, his good one links around Dextera's neck, pulling him closer so their foreheads can touch.] It's fine. It just means I have to be careful. Mahiru-no-yo is fighting whatever it is off right now.

[But, honestly... if it gets bad, he can just give her more desire. More greed. He has plenty of both of those things, and it would increase her strength. He would just have to be careful not to go too far! It's fine.]

Sorry to scare you like that.

[ dextera does take relief in being this close, and their clothes have started to dry enough that it's not quite as cold as before, despite being later. the blankets aren't all the way there yet, and his coat was too bunched as a makeshift pillow to properly dry, but the two of them personally have managed it. ]

...

[ he exhales, closing his eyes. ]

It's not your fault. It's not like you decided to get hurt like that. I just...

[ guren takes so many risks that it's hard not to worry, especially now that he might not be able to heal himself as efficiently as before. they could actually die, if caught off guard like before. he shakes his head, re-positioning himself so he can tuck his face into the curve where guren's neck becomes his shoulder. ]

[Someone caring this much about him... He gets it all the time with his friends, but every time someone new does, it's entirely different. Dextera, especially, isn't just someone who cares because Guren is a leader type, or has some other use. It's... different. Different in plenty of ways.

Guren brings his hand to the back of Dextera's head, running his fingers through his hair in gentle, reassuring strokes. He doesn't mind just staying like this for a while.]

I should have died countless times over the years, but somehow, I'm still here. [He can feel the worry from Dextera, and he's pretty sure he knows why. He must be worried that he's weak now. The truth is, he was strong before his demon, but it was never strong enough. But here, reset back at zero, his determination is unwavering. He'll get stronger and stronger until he can protect everyone he cares about and himself.]

This is nothing. I'll get past it just like everything else. I have too many things to do to die. I have to live. So I will. That's all it is.

[Despite how ridiculous the words are, he's so confident and certain that it really is something else.]

[ it's not that he doesn't trust guren. they've come this far, lived this long, and guren has kept his promise of staying steady and focused without dextera needing to follow through on that deal they made when they first came here. he's proved himself reliable as a person, not just as a fighter, and dextera isn't the type to usually doubt people so far.

but it's hard to predict this forest. ]

I don't think I have a choice but to trust you. I'll go crazy if I don't.

[ the words are murmured against him, but dextera is close enough that guren can probably hear them anyway, no matter how muffled or soft. ]

[ Ah, poor Dex... Guren really worried him too much like this. He’ll heve to be careful not to let too much show that would make him worry again. That’s his first thought, fingers still stroking his hair, face turning against his head to press a small kiss. ]

Don’t go crazy. [ He doesn’t want to see that!! It’s quiet, too. ] I’ll be fine. So will you. We’ll stay here for a while longer, first.

[ Everything in this forest seems dangerous, but Guren will be even more careful than usual. Without his demon, even small injuries will worry Dextera. He doesn’t want to upset him more than he already has. ]

[ despite the difficulty that got them here, this particular area does seem peaceful. the water is warm and welcoming, even if it was cold getting out of it, and the lakeshore seems to be relatively lush—even grey, as it is. with color, it would seem like an oasis, amidst the dark forest. ]

...okay.

[ he's calming down now, assured by guren's confidence even if he can't make himself thoroughly agree with it just yet. he takes a deep breath, and lifts his head so he can give guren a proper kiss... something welcoming, relieved that he's still here for them to have this conversation. ]

Okay. [ a second time, more confident. ] It's... not too bad, here.

Right?

[Smiling at that slow shift into something nicer, Guren leans in to kiss him again. He'd been a little surprised that Dextera was confident enough to initiate one on his own, but of course he likes it. Of course he wants to hold onto... whatever this is.]

The water was even warm. I didn't get that chill to the bones like the water in town. [Thank god, too, or they'd still be freezing. They're just a little damp, and their items could use some more drying, but...]

Going in on purpose wouldn't be such a bad thing... We could probably find a part that's a little more shallow for you.

[ guren probably doesn't mean anything by it, but dextera is still a little embarrassed to have it mentioned that he needs something shallow. he never learned to swim! he grew up in a laboratory! so what!! ]

...I would be okay to just put my feet in.

[ maybe he's scared... but it's a mild fear, the way some people are nervous to try a new food, or are a little hesitant about making a phone call. ]

[The embarrassment is cute, so even if he didn't mean it, he might tease him in the future a little... For now, though, he's smiling, looking to the water and letting his fingers finally slip out of Dextera's hair.]

Do you want to do that with me? We can sit and relax for a little bit. [His smile fades a little as he thinks, but he makes sure to keep its skeleton in place.] I doubt you were able to get any sleep while I was out...

[So, relaxing is good. Maybe it'll even help him be able to sleep later...?]

[ dextera nods. he'd like that—and guren is right, he didn't get any sleep. he couldn't even think of sleeping with guren out as he was, although exhaustion did creep over him once or twice during lulls of silence. every time guren had murmured something new, though, dextera was awake again with the hope that he was returning to consciousness.

things are easier now, obviously.

he pulls off his boots, scooting closer to the water and staring down into it. despite being in the middle of the forest, it actually seems... more than peaceful. it seems safe. ]

Are there lakes where you're from?

Yeah.

[Guren goes ahead and slips his own shoes off, scooting to the very edge of the water next to Dextera. He rolls his pant legs up and then lets his legs hang over, dipping easily into the water. See, it's nice!!]

When I was about five, I even remember this waterfall... It was where I would go to train on my own. [The water is still warm... Guren leans down and dips a couple fingertips into it, too.]

With the world how it is now, it would be too difficult to go sight seeing. Shibuya is walled off, so it's like its own little world. There are just wrecked buildings and crashed cars outside of there, and if there aren't horsemen of the apocalypse to worry about, it's the vampires.

[ dextera follows guren’s lead and rolls up his pants, slipping his legs into the warm water. now that he’s not being plunged into it and choking on every breath, it really is pleasant. soothing. he smiles, briefly, and then turns his face to guren—he actually trained under a waterfall? really?

he shouldn’t be surprised. ]

Maybe you could go back one day, anyway. I bet it’s even nicer than it was before.

[ he scoots closer to guren... casually. ]

[He laughs softly, but it's to hide his thoughts. The spot with the waterfall is where he first met Mahiru. He doesn't want to say that at all, let alone mention that he's been back to his mansion to turn the basement into a lab for human experimentation.

There are the bodies of so many of the people he wants to bring back to life in there.]

Yeah... maybe. [But he leaves it at that, focusing instead on the cute way Dextera scoots over. He's going to feed it by innocently resting his hand on the small space of rock in between them as he peers at the water. He's maybe a little hopeful about it.]

Do you like lakes like this?

[ it’s for the best that dextera doesn’t realize what he’s thinking about—at least not until guren’s thoughts turn a little lighter, and dextera can pick up on that hopefulness between them.

he slides his hand into that last space between them, his fingers brushing against guren’s fingertips in a way that’s oddly shy, considering how much they always touch hands.

it’s the mood! the mood is hard to resist. ]

I’ve never seen one. [ he admits that freely, kicking his legs gently through the water. ] I’ve never seen anything like this.

Really?

[His heart feels more nervous than he'd ever give away in body language and expression. Again, he feels like a kid. What is this, puppy love? But it's different, it's so much stronger, and it's hard to make himself turn away. His fingers slip closer at the slight brush, interlacing a few of them with Dextera's as they rest against the ground.]

I wish you could have walked up to it normally. Places like this are beautiful, even when they've lost all their color.

[He turns to give Dextera a look, a small smile. This mood... it's much better than before.]

[ dextera’s gaze out over the water is content, considering how worried he was before that guren was irreparably broken by whatever has blocked his demon. maybe it’s holding hands, maybe it’s just the power of the water licking at his skin.

he’s relaxed, and he fully laces their hands together as he leans against guren, their shoulders bumping softly. he glances up, without moving his head especially far. ]

Maybe it’s a good thing we came here.

[ they should still get out, but... for now... this is nice. ]

Hmm.

[He swings his own legs in the water once or twice, letting them relax as he squeezes at Dextera's hand, instead. It's been terrible in plenty of ways, but he's grateful for the events that lead up to this. Their time in the cabin, their time here...]

I think so. We were able to end up together. [He nudges his body weight against him, slight, just enough to keep touching even when they're already pressed arm to arm.] I don't want to go anywhere else right now.

[ together... even if guren didn’t mean it like that exactly, dextera is inclined to agree that any interpretation is a good sign for them.]

Guren.

[ he’s soft, immensely grateful for what they’ve found in this privacy. ]

I... [ he pauses, shyly. ] I like you. A lot.

[Somehow, he wasn't expecting those bold words from Dextera. He finds himself holding his breath as he tries to process it, to think of how to react, but brief surprise already crosses his face. He wants to say it back, to put some of this feeling into words, but... it feels like worry holds him back. Like saying it will make something crash down and separate the two of them who currently have nothing in between them.

He manages to look calm as he watches Dextera's shy face and then looks down to their joined hands, but he's worried that he's going to ruin this. Dextera was mute for a while, and he still handles those words better than Guren.]

...

[He lets out the breath he was holding, instead, and when that's not enough, he closes the small distance between their faces and kisses Dextera sweetly on the lips. He hopes that's clear enough, as he's squeezing his hand.]

[ it’s more of a response than dextera could have asked for, really. he nearly follows it up by asking if it’s okay, or if guren doesn’t mind, but the way he kisses dextera is answer enough to all of those pressing little concerns he couldn’t resist. ]

Mm...

[ he doesn’t want anything but this moment, together with guren.

he kisses back, craning so he can more easily close that gap between their heights without disturbing their positions on the water’s edge. he feels better now, in all ways, his heart lightened by guren’s eager reception of his feelings. ]

You don’t have to say anything. [ against his mouth, followed by another kiss. ] I know.

[ It’s like he’s being called out between these warm, lovely kisses. He doesn’t have to say anything, as if he needs the reassurance. Mm, but he does, actually. He doesn’t know what he’s doing or how well he’s doing it. His cheeks flush the slightest bit at that reassurance, but he ignores it.

He leans forward, kissing him still, angling his body to face him straight on, stretching his leg to brush against and between Dextera’s. ]

You could do better than a guy like me. [ Finally, he manages something, continuing his kissing immediately after to make it clear that he’s not actually worried. Determination has him going for keeping Dextera close, even if he deserves better. Guren is too greedy. ]

[ dextera doesn’t care if he could do better. he doesn’t know what better could even look like, if guren isn’t the best he’s ever had—guren gives him everything he could ever ask for, anything he might need. he adores guren.

he “likes” guren “a lot.” ]

I don’t want anyone else.

[ he parts from the kiss, his face flushed from equal parts pleasure and embarrassment. ]

I just want you.

[ It’s crazy to think that things ended up like this. Plenty of people have confessed to him, despite his self deprecating words, but the pull was never this strong. His hand touches to Dextera’s cheek, tracing down to his jaw, back to his ear, and Guren is completely absorbed. ]

You’ve got me. [ Leaning forward slowly, he kisses at his jaw, fingers lacing through his hair. He can’t stop this affection. It’s all he wants to do, to be this close. ] I’m not going anywhere.

[ dextera is hopelessly charmed by guren...

there's a time and place for banter, but he can't seem to make himself offer it up now when he's being so sincere—when he thinks guren is being sincere too, in his own way. it's the kiss against his jaw, the fingers in his hair. he pulls his legs a little bit out of the water, and it doesn't even feel cold with how warm his body is from affection. ]

...we're alone.

[ a simple observation............. or is it? ]

[ He’s being completely sincere, fingers curling into Dextera’s hair, eyes tracing his expression as he says that. ]

So we are. [ What a leading statement. Those words alone have his heart beating fast, and it has to mean that Dextera is implying what he thinks he’s implying... ] What should we do about it?

[ Go on, tell him, he wants to hear it... ]

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